


Crossing the Line

by Missnorthstar



Category: Vis a Vis El Oasis - Fandom, Vis a Vis | Locked In (Spain TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M, post episode 07 Vis a Vis El Oasis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24529132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missnorthstar/pseuds/Missnorthstar
Summary: Zulema hated losing control and Maca just crossed a line. The morning after New Year.
Relationships: Macarena Ferreiro/Zulema Zahir
Comments: 65
Kudos: 206





	1. The Morning After

The Morning After

Chapter 1

She woke up with the worst headache she has ever had in years. One of the reasons she never does drug is the loss of control, even for a few hours, she hates it, she hates that feeling. Why she gave in she’ll never know. One minute Maca was getting into her skin, as she does lately, the next, she’s licking fucking cocaine from the blonde’s finger. Macarena was talking about losing control, it was New Year’s Eve after all, to let go and enjoy the moment. It was tempting, for sure, to not think about anything, to just feel and go with the flow, they were safe, for now, although the four bodies they just had buried would say otherwise. 

She covered her eyes from the sunlight that was coming through the windows of the caravan. She was exhausted, spent, and the ache between her legs reminded her of her poor choices in life once again. She looked to her right with a sigh and rolled her eyes at the sight that met her. Macarena was lying face down; a mop of blond hair spread on the pillow, and the sheets barely covering her ass, angry nails marks on her back. Zulema never saw it coming and last night was a blur. In the five years she has known her, the blonde has come from being a sanctimonious goody two-shoes to an authentic hija de puta, and as Maca would say; it was all thanks to her. The blonde would say that Zulema has made her who she is today. After all, she had destroyed her life, in a way, and it was all Zulema’s fault that Macarena’s parents were dead. In all fairness, Zulema did not make her commit the crime that sent Maca to jail, and once there, what did she expect jail was, a fucking boarding school? 

Yesterday she had decided to call a truce and get the blonde a present, Christmas spirits and all that jazz. A polaroid camera to remember their “good times”. The blonde had downplayed her good intentions and reminded Zulema once again that their relationship was a “marriage of convenience” soon to blow up to pieces. That had brought Zulema back to reality for a second and reminded her that Maca was always going to hate her. 

She got out of bed slowly, not wanting to wake the blonde and deal with probably an awkward situation before her morning coffee. She looked around and found her clothes from the night before sprawled all over the floor. She put them back on deciding on a shower later and moved to the kitchen to make herself some coffee, perhaps an aspirin would help with the headache as well. As it turned out, there was no coffee left in the house. It was Maca’s turn to go grocery shopping yesterday, but it was the holidays and all markets were closed early. With a sigh she put on her boots and went outside to get some air. The lingering smell of sex and alcohol was starting to nauseate her. 

Her relationship with the blonde has always been complicated since the moment they met. They were not friends and were not supposed to become friends. Yet, there was always this tension between them, and this pull that made them both seek the other once out of jail and form this partnership that everyone in their right minds would call a very, very bad idea. But the thought of being alone was more terrifying than the idea of being together, though Zulema was not going to admit that to anyone. But what happened last night was not something she would have anticipated. She was not into women, in all her years in prison she never once entertained the thought of sex with another woman. She loved men, she was in a relationship with one for years, and she loved him, but no more than she loved her freedom, and that love had gotten him killed. 

With a shake of her head to clear her thoughts she decided that what was done was done. She had moved on a long time ago, there was no point in staying in the past when the future was uncertain, and the present was not what she had planned. Her whole life was fucked up as it is and thinking about it too much was making her head hurt even more. 

She lit up a cigarette as she walked to the shooting spot. She had picked up her gun on her way out. After last night incident with the four motherfuckers who tried to rape them she thought it best to always carry it with her, perhaps to spare the blonde from another shooting spree should another unwanted visitor showed up. Macarena, she realized, had become something she would not have expected. She had told the blonde she had crossed that line there was no coming back from. She had welcomed her to Hell, and Maca had embraced it. She started shooting her gun as she thought of the blonde and what they did last night. She though of the way her body felt near her. They had been on each other personal spaces before, threatening their lives on a pissing contest, establishing who was stronger, who was in control. It was a familiar feeling having her that close, breath on their faces as they stare at each other waiting on whoever was going to break first. But last night was different, Maca was looking at her in a different way, she was high, sure, but not enough to know what she was doing. And it had awakened something in her that she had never experienced before. It freaked her out for a second and got out of bed the moment the blonde mentioned wanting to touch her face. They never touch each other unless it was to throw a punch to the other's face, and Maca, high on drugs and alcohol, was getting too close and too touchy. 

As she continued shooting a target with her gun she remembered her heart racing when Macarena started touching her face with her fingers. Feather touches that burned her skin as fingers moved from her forehead to her lips to her chin. She had told Maca that they would not be fucking, and the blonde had laughed at her comment. She knew what Maca was thinking, she knew she wanted it, she knew she was doing everything to forget that line she had crossed a couple of hours before when she killed those men. She knew there were no feelings involved, only raw desire, and sex, just plain sex between two fucked up adults. So, she gave in, the blonde was challenging her in a way, and she has never backed down from a challenge. 

Zulema heard the door of the caravan close and new the blonde had finally woken up. She was coming with two mugs.

“About last night” the blonde said as she extended a mug to Zulema “it was stupid” 

Zulema relished the warm feeling of the mug on her hand as she held it. It was a cold morning. “yeah…sex between women is overrated” she said offhandedly, and the blonde smiled.

“Right…well, its ok that you were clumsy” Maca said emphasizing with her head “it was your first time after all”

She was getting under her skin again, Zulema thought. The blonde never stops antagonizing her as it turns out. She decides to change the subject.

“I already thought about our next move” 

“Great…you can tell me later” and with that she walked away, back to the caravan. 

Zulema was left with her thoughts and the clenching feeling in her chest as she emptied the mug in front of her. Fucking blonde and her insults. Zulema did not think about it until now. It was her first time with a woman, the annoying blonde was the first woman she had sex with and Maca had been smug about it. She had never thought about a woman that way. When she first met Saray all those years ago in prison, the young woman had a crush on her as she later confessed, but as she told Saray and everyone else who tried to get into her pants, she was not interested, sex with women was not her thing. Yesterday, she had to go and spread her legs for stupid Maca. She hated herself, not because she had done it, at the end of the day sex was just sex, but because it had happened with the blonde. And as it turned out, it was something that she now could not stop thinking about. Fucking blonde!. She threw the mug on the grass and continue shooting.


	2. Feelings are for the weaks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to post a 2nd chapter for you guys. I'm a nurse and will be working for the next three nights so I will not have time to post until after the weekend. Maybe Sunday.  
> I always read, I'm not a writer so, I hope you like this one. I am not sure which direction it'll take, I'm just using the feelings I got from the last episode when it comes to character development.  
> Please leave a comment if you're enjoying so far.

Chapter 2

They were running, the new hit did not go as planned. Drops of sweat were falling down Zulema’s back as she followed the blonde through a dark alley. Her head was pounding, and she couldn’t see very well. Maca stopped to look back when she sensed the older woman was not following her. 

“Come on…we gotta keep going” the blonde said, stopping when she noticed Zulema bending over, hands on her head and trying to catch her breath. 

“You go ahead…I’ll catch up later” Maca looked at her with a frown then looked around them for any danger, sensing none for the time being.

“I’m not leaving you here” Zulema smiled at her, with a smirk that was entirely annoying to Maca “Why blondie, I never knew you cared” 

“Only because it’d affect me by proxy” she replied getting closer to Zulema and throwing her right arm over her shoulders. “Come on, we’ve done worse than this, we’re not going down tonight”

Zulema let her practically drag her out of the alley. She did not remember hitting her head but God it hurts! Every step felt like smashing her face against a wall and she still couldn’t see shit. 

They finally reached their car. Maca threw the duffle bag she was carrying in the back sit as she helped Zulema get in the passenger’s. She heard the police sirens in the distance as she started the car and drove off. Zulema was hunched over her seat, the pounding in her head was only getting worse and she was starting to feel nauseous. After 40 minutes driving she could not hold it any longer and asked the blonde to pull over. 

“Are you fucking serious?!” Maca had asked with wide eyes looking at the back mirror expecting the police behind them.

“If you don’t want me to throw up all over you and your lovely car then I’d suggest you stop now” Zulema said clenching her teeth swallowing back a wave of nausea.  
Maca pulled over with concern on her face “The fuck is wrong with you?” Are you pregnant?”

If it weren’t for the fact that her head was about to explode, and she was about to throw up her entire life she would have laughed. Opening the car door and running a few feet way from it Zulema bended over and emptied her stomach. These headaches were becoming more annoying by the day. They would wake her up in the middle of the night and would mess up her entire day. 

“Let’s go” she said after wiping her mouth with the back of her hand and walking back to the car. Maca was leaning into it with a half empty plastic bottle of water offering it to Zulema. The brunette looked at the blonde for a second while she grabbed the bottle. After cleaning her mouth with it she threw it away and got in the car. Maca still standing outside and looking at her with a puzzling look on her face.

“What?” Zulema had said with a shrug and Maca decided that the questioning could wait. She got in the car and drove away.

Zulema was sitting on her usual spot on the roof of the caravan with her eyes closed enjoying the night breeze when she heard the blonde approach. Macarena took a sit next to her and lit up a cigarette. 

She noticed when Maca reached into her pocket and pulled out a small package. With her finger she smeared some of its content and was about to reach her finger to her mouth when Zulema grab her hand.

“You’re are not doing that shit again” She said in a serious tone grabbing the small pouch from Maca with her free hand and throwing it far away.

“That shit is expensive…you know that?” 

“More reasons for you not to use it, stop wasting our money"

“Are you afraid of a little repeat of a week ago?” Maca said with a smirk. She was trying to annoy her for sure, Zulema thought.

“I thought you said it was stupid” She returned the smirk, two can play this game. “Is this your way of saying you want it to happen again rubia?”

It had been a week since their little private party, and she realized they had never mentioned it again. Zulema was glad they hadn’t, but every now and then she still thought about it. Fuck!

“Over my dead body” Zulema wasn’t sure why Maca always tried to play a game she was sure she’d loose. “What happened to you today” The blonde continued, thinking the time was as good as any to question Zulema on her state earlier.

“My stomach does not agree with your cooking” The brunette answer simply with a shoulder shrug and lighting a rollup of her own.

“Whatever…I know there’s something wrong with you ever since you bought that trampoline” Maca said with a frown and staring at Zulema as if trying to figure out what was possible going on with her just by looking at her. 

“Everything is fine rubia” She replied taking a drag of her cigarette and closing her eyes.

Her thoughts took her to dangerous paths. Ever since she slept with the blonde she thought of little else and she hated herself for it. She was not sure why Maca was on her mind most of the time. She thought is was probably the fact that the blonde had mocked her the morning after it happened and it had hurt her ego. Or it was perhaps the fact that she had not have felt that alive in years. Maca had, despite regretting it afterwards and being high as a kite, made her feel something she never felt before. The blonde had touched her and kissed her in ways she’d never thought she would. The only feelings that exist between them was hate and distrust, but that night, that night she felt something else from the blonde. She felt repressed desire and wanton need with every kiss on her skin and every touch, and Zulema had reciprocated as well. 

When Maca had said “lets go to bed” something in her clicked. She had always felt the need to fucking punch the blonde at every turn for being so annoying but as she now thinks about it, she always felt something that was consuming and suffocating and knew would not be resolved with a punch or a beating. 

Thinking back to years in prison and now out in the world. She had hurt Maca many times, and she had wanted her dead, but never had the guts to actually kill her, and she wondered why that was. She needed her at one point to carry out her plan of escape, but she has been needing her on a whole different level for a few years now. She needed the blonde alive somehow, even if not with her, but alive. She opened her eyes and looked to her right, Maca was observing her with an intense look on her face. 

“If you ever think of betraying me I will kill you” the blonde said leaning over Zulema and looking into her eyes. After a few seconds she smiled and walked away, climbing down the stairs. 

“I will not be the one betraying, Maca” Zulema had whisper to herself taking another drag of he cigarette and blowing out the smoke.


	3. Life never goes as planned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had some time, so an early update... Hope you like it and thanks again for reading.

Chapter 3 

“How long have you been experiencing them” the doctor had asked while typing something on his tablet. When he did not get a response, he looked up expectantly.

“The headaches?” the brunette asked with eyebrows raised. Pursing her lips and taking a deep breath through her nose she replied. “A couple of days maybe…”

“Zulema…this information is extremely important” Putting down his tablet the doctor looked at her and crossed his hands resting them on the table. 

Zulema adjusted her sitting position and bite on her thumb before answering, “Fine…a month now…I think”

The doctor resumed his typing and Zulema got up from her chair and started roaming around the room. There were plants on a corner and some Van Gogh paintings on opposite walls. The bookshelf facing the desk had an assortment of medical books and pictures of a family, the doctor’s, she assumed. Would she have had a family as well, had Hanbal still be alive? Where would she be now if that was the case? Some place in Morocco perhaps, not Egypt though, she hated the place and swore she would never step foot there again the moment she finally left. They both had plans, Hanbal and her, of a life in freedom with more money they wouldn’t know what to do with. Never a child though, that was never in her plans, she had one once, a little girl that was taken from her the moment she was born, and who was now dead because of her, adding that to the list of lives she had destroyed, because that was what she did. She destroys everything she touches including herself, and now Maca will pr….

“I will give you some medications for the headaches and another to prep you for treatment which will be scheduled in three weeks from now”. The doctor interrupted her train of thoughts. “I still need to finish your paperwork for the clinical trial” He added and extended a document for her to complete. “We will need an emergency contact; someone we could add as a support system on your file”

“I already told you I have no one” Zulema replied taking her place back on the chair and putting her left leg on the armrest.

“I am trying to help you here Zulema” He said putting down the piece of paper back on the table between them. “This doesn’t have to be a death sentence…I am confident that the treatment will work, but we need to know that you will follow all protocol after, and you WILL need someone to help you with that” 

When Zulema first got a diagnosis, she decided this was going to be the end. She did not go through a denial phase or cried her eyeballs out thinking “why me?!”. Although she did not want to die yet, she accepted it from day one. Doctor Hamil had been pestering her to get into a clinical trial. He insisted on it and threaten her to call the police if she didn’t follow thru. Yes, he knew who she was, the entire country probably knew who she was after almost two years of robbing jewelries and banks. But Dr Hamil somehow had understood her, and maybe pitied her in a way. She didn’t deserve to die in prison, he had said. If only he knew. 

She picked up the paper and wrote down the name and number of the only person she’d think of. “Do not call her before treatment starts” She had said giving back the documents. “Only after I’m done…please”

She left Dr Hamil’s office with the same attitude she had come. She will not get her hopes up. But she will die the same way she had lived, fighting. She went around town, not wanting to go home just yet. Maca was probably there and she did not feel like dealing with her right now. Most of her decisions lately had involved the blonde. When she heard the word cancer, her first thought was of Maca, and what she would do after she’s gone, not so many fucked up choices perhaps. Would she go back to her old life? To her brother? Would she be happy that Zulema was finally 6 feet under? So, she had agreed to the treatment, and the medications that makes her nauseous, and the fucking needles and the once a week doctor’s appointments where she has to wait for two hours to been seen. All because, deep down, she didn’t want to leave fucking Maca alone. The thought made her laugh, and she started laughing, out loud, in the middle of the plaza like some fucking crazy lady that everyone looks at. When she finally calmed down and the idea didn’t seem that funny to her anymore she adjusted her hoodie, lighted a cigarette and kept walking down the road. 

The bar was not so crowded, which was good, the less people the better. She orders a vodka and a beer as she watches people dancing on the floor and others playing pool in the corner of the bar. She keeps thinking of Maca, and that it would be nice to come here with her some time. But as it turned out, alcohol, Maca and herself did not mix very well. She is terrified of what she might be feeling, terrified of what that night may have changed for her. But if she was being truly honest with herself, it was way before that night when she started seeing Maca in a different light. Giving her that camera as a gift was perhaps a starting point. They get along well, sometimes, but they’re not friends. Perhaps somewhere, deep down in her heart, she started wanting to be Maca’s friend. Whether it was her health that was going downhill pretty fast or the fact that she might be getting old, she felt she wanted to be nicer to the woman she’s been living with for the past two years. She wanted the blonde to not hate her anymore. 

“Do you wanna dance?” She heard from behind and turned around slowly. The guy was good-looking, she thought. In his thirties, perhaps, with a pretty smile and a drink in his hand. 

“I don’t dance” she had answered and decided to indulge him a bit.” But I do drink”

His smile grew wider and he signaled the bartender to add another of what she was drinking and one more for him. He drowned his drink in one gulp and placed the glass on the counter as he took a sit next to her. “I’m Julian by the way, very nice to meet you” he introduced himself extending his hand for her to shake. Zulema looked at him for a second trying to figure out if he was a cop or a poor soul thinking this was his lucky night. 

“Do you want to get out of here Julian?” was her reply after giving it a thought, because…why not? She’s seen too many cops in her life and decided that this guy was not one of them. He looked at her surprised with eyebrows raised understanding the offer. He paid for both drinks and waited for her to finish hers.

They ended up in a cheap motel conveniently located one block from the bar. She was far from being drunk but when has that stopped her. He was an attractive man and she hadn’t been with one in a very long time. She was enjoying herself when her phone started ringing on the floor as it almost fell off her pants’ pocket in her haste of taking it off. It was lighting up a number she knew by heart. Fucking blonde and her poor timing! “Is that your husband?” the guy has stopped pounding on her for a second to question her with a worried look on his face and out of breath. The question made her laugh. “God no” she anwered as she rolled them both in bed positioning herself on top. “Ignore it” and she continue kissing him and riding him to orgasm. As she came, the one image that came to her mind was Macarena’s face. “Fuck!”

“Where the hell have you been?” the sight that greets her as she enters the caravan was of a furious blonde with a knife in her hand.

“Good afternoon to you too rubia” she replies taking off her boots. “Is that for me?” she questions signaling the knife with her head and a smile on her face.

“I was making dinner” was the answer she got as the blonde went back to chopping vegetables. ”Where the hell were you for almost two days?” 

“I had a date” Zulema replied nonchalant taking off her clothes and gathering a towel intending to take a shower.

“A date?” the blonde looked at her with an amused look on her face. “With whom?”

“I don’t kiss and tell rubia” she winked at Maca as she made her way to the bathroom.

As soon as she came down from her high she had rolled out of bed and started to get dressed. Picking up her cellphone from the floor she saw the notification light on of a missed call, deciding to ignore it yet again she put it back on her pants pocket and gathered the rest of her stuff. 

“Can I see you again?” He had asked sitting up in bed, smiling at her.

“You don’t wanna see me again” was her reply as she moved to the door ready to leave.

“I’ve never met anyone like you” he moved to reach the edge of the bed resting his feet on the floor, sheets covering his waist. “I would like to see you again” 

“No…really…you don’t” She opened the door with a smile, closing it finally behind her. She checked her gun was on her leg pocket and left the place. 

She ended up in the hotel she had found a few months ago. It was almost sunrise and it would be quite the view if it weren’t for the fact that this place was as fucked up as Cruz del Norte was. She would come here when she was trying to avoid killing Maca whenever she was being her annoying self. She had been lucky, she thought. Months and months tracking down Sandoval’s family she ended up in this private paradise in the middle of fucking nowhere. She had thought about it for nights on end and she hadn’t decided yet what to do with it. A back up plan perhaps should the blonde finally turned on her. Their partnership was never a matter of if it ends one day, it was when it will end, and she wasn’t called the “Fucking Elf of Hell” for no reason. Her true nature will shine on regardless of what she felt for the blonde. Maca might be crawling her way into her heart little by little, but she had Hanbal killed for her own selfish reasons, and she loved him once. Not that she would call her feelings for the blonde, love. Far from it. But there was something there she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Something, not entirely new, but foreign, almost forgotten, that she was fighting tooth and nails to ger rid of. It was almost late afternoon when she decided to head home.


	4. All Relationships End Bad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so, no work tonight. Overstaffed and all. Not complaining.  
> I don't know what the last episode will be like, so I have deviated and came up with my own version. I would also like to explore what could happen after the final episode. Hope you like this one and thank you all for your comments :)

Chapter 4

A week had passed when Maca told her she wanted out. They were burning the car they used for the heist getting rid of all evidence that could lead the police to them. And at that moment Zulema realized it was their end. Maca was going to leave, but she knew the blonde hated her enough to finally turn on her and eliminate all that could link her to the brunette. She was well aware that the only way for Maca to be free of her and of her past was to completely destroy Zulema once and for all. As she turned her back to the flames and started walking one single tear fell on her cheek and she felt her heart shattered in tiny pieces. The last time she cried was when she heard her daughter fall from a helicopter in the middle of a prison yard. She hasn’t shed a tear ever since, until now. She wiped her face and continued walking. It was time for plan B.

They gathered a team, for one last hit and it was all going to work perfectly well except for one tiny fact that she did not see coming. Dr Hamil had warned her, he had said the moment it started was the final sign that everything was going downhill. She had not believed him of course, she has always been in control, one step ahead of everyone else in this fucked up world, that’s how she had survived this long. But this was something she couldn’t control. Seeing herself in that disgusting yellow uniform again told her everything she needed to know. 

She had sold Maca to Sandoval’s mother. If the blonde was going to betray her, Zulema will betray her first, that’s what they did. But once again the blonde had survived as she usually does. Deep down Zulema was glad when she saw her again…up in her face, yelling at her for one reason or another as she would, demanding an explanation about her illness and the pills Zulema’s been hiding. It was Maca's pastime it seems, to scream and fight with her. She will miss this, Zulema thought. She will miss living together and fighting over little things like old married couples and Maca had no idea of how much. When the blonde told her she was pregnant, her mind went to that first day she met the blonde, how she killed her unborn child and how her relationship with Maca was never going to be more that what it already was…toxic and so…so messed up. She looked at the blonde and thought about her choices in life and everything she did to her…and where they would both be had she let the other woman be the moment she came to prison. But it was too late now, and she was silently mourning the fact that she will not be part of that child’s life should both he and his mother survived. Pity…she thought…she would have been a “damn cool aunt” to Maca’s baby. 

She had made many mistakes in her life, but the biggest yet was to mess with a Mexican narco boss and his entire family. It was a good idea at the time, and it if it weren’t for the fact that there was a tumor growing inside her head she would have thought better. She actually knew better, but she had nothing to lose and Maca leaving her was driving her to do crazy shit. Like this one.

Ramala, the big scary owner of a drug empire, had been one step ahead this time. Flaca was dead, Monica as well, and Maca was just about to follow. Zulema told her as she left her there, in that warehouse, where the blonde was held captive by Ramada and his minions, that her life and her child’s was not her problem. She had regretted it the moment she went back to the hotel. All she thought about was Maca, bitten up, with a pool of blood between her legs. And she finally realized what the blonde meant to her. She started hating her when she first met her, for being so naïve, then to respect her for becoming an even greater bitch than Zulema herself was, to care for her in the last years in prison, and then to this, this consuming feelings she’s never felt for anyone before. She had been falling in love with Maca throughout the years together and she never realized it until now. There was always this attraction between them neither of them knew what it meant and were always attributing to their hate for each other. But the blonde had kissed her and touched her, and Zulema had liked it…very much. Maca was making her weak, soft in ways that she has never been before. And she had never felt this urge…this need to protect someone so much in her life. 

Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her cellphone from her back pocket and dialed a number she had learned to memorize over the years. “It’s time” she simply said and hung up without waiting for a confirmation…she knew they would come. She armed herself to the teeth and left the room. 

Ramala was waiting for her on a cliff with the blonde next to him. If the situation wasn’t as dire as it was at the moment she would have laugh at it. It all looked like those Western American movies Maca loved to watch and Zulema hated…another stuff to add to the list of things they would always fight about. She had brought Ramala’s daughter with her as an exchange for Maca. The blonde had whispered to her as she passed by that she didn’t know whether to punch her in the face or thank her. Zulema thought she’d probably do both, but this was not the time…perhaps later…if they were lucky. She was following Maca to the car when she heard the gunshot. She turned around and realized that they were both definitely screwed if they weren’t already. She yelled at Maca to run and started shooting her guns to Ramada’s guys as they opened fire on her, until they found coverage behind a truck. “Listen to me rubia” Zulema said squinting her eyes as the first sign of a headache announced itself. “The helicopter would be here any minute” her mouth was watering as an effect of the nausea she was all of the sudden feeling, she swallowed and continued “When you see it…I want you to run…fast..”

“Cut the crap Zulema…there’s no helicopter… there never was!” Maca was starting to get scared. She did not know what Zulema was planning but it probably involved getting her killed… in the middle of the fucking desert of Almeria. 

Zulema shot two rounds before lowering herself again behind the truck “Fuck Maca! Listen to me for once in your life…ok?” “It will be here…so you run as soon as you see it…I’ll cover you”

“And what…you want me to believe you’ll stay behind to get yourself killed…for what..? for me…? Maca said with a scowl not believing Zulema for one minute. 

“Yes” Zulema simply said and stood up to continue shooting. 

Maca was looking at her with disbelieve, frowning, when she heard it. A fucking helicopter was approaching their way. She looked back at Zulema from her crunching position and finally realized what was going on here. The brunette really didn’t have anything to lose, she thought. Zulema was going to die anyways and for a second she froze. The same strange feeling of emptiness she experienced when she heard the brunette was sick was hitting her full force now. She always thought of Zulema as invincible, a lot of shit had happened to her and she had always survived. So, the mere idea now of not seeing her anymore felt complete strange to her. She wanted to leave her side, she had sold her to the police, she had told Zulema she was like a cancer that she had to get rid of if she wanted to continue with her life. She always blamed Zulema for her own bad choices, believing her that the fact that they were together was the only reason she was as messed up as Zulema was. She had changed yes, Zulema had something to do with it in a way, but it was Maca alone who made the decision to follow her. Perhaps she has always been this way, and Zulema had just opened the door to that new life and now she was dying on her and Maca’s heart was breaking. 

She was finally getting rid of Zulema and a clenching feeling in her chest was taking over her every move. She was paralyzed, and she couldn’t stop looking up at the brunette as she kept shooting. “Go!” Zulema had yelled waking her up from her stupor. Macarena started running as if in trance looking back at the brunette every now and then. She saw the helicopter descend as she approached it and then she saw Roman…extending his arm to her. Roman was here... She continued running full force as her eyes started tearing, she never thought she’d see him again. She grabbed her brother’s arm and he pulled her up next to him. He signaled the pilot to take off as Macarena looked down one last time, seeing Zulema falling…a pool of blood next to her and two other cars approaching the scene.


	5. What Happens When We're Gone?

Chapter 5

Macarena was sitting in a chair with legs crossed under her and a mug of tea between her hands. She was wearing an old white t-shirt and gray sweatpants that Roman had lend her. She felt numb and disoriented. She couldn’t stop thinking of Zulema and how determined she was to stay behind. It has been two days since it all happened. She hadn’t done much since then, unable to formulate a plan on what to do now. She was finally free…right? That was what she wanted…she thought. But somehow victory didn’t taste as sweet anymore. She felt tired, exhausted from the last two years on the run and she just wanted to sleep, to put her head on a pillow and not think of anything else, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t stop the thoughts roaming free in her mind. She couldn’t stop thinking of Zulema’s face and how she had been looking at the blonde lately. How she has been letting Maca get away with things. How the brunette had been avoiding fights with her in the past few months. Did she know that she was dying, and she was wanting to redeem herself somehow by being nicer to Maca? With a sigh, she emptied her drink and rested the mug between her legs. The ache she felt in her chest was consuming. 

When Cepo told her about Zulema and the fact that she was sick she had felt this anger she hadn’t experienced in a long time. They never trusted each other…that was true…and they kept secrets between them…like her pregnancy. But she was tired of being lied to and she knew she was being a hypocrite because she has been lying too. But this…being lied to about this…was something entirely different. She knew something was not right. She had told Zulema when she saw her on that stupid trampoline. She knew her enough to know something was not right. But Zulema was a child, and she would do childish things, so she let it go. And now, she would never see her again. A single tear run down her cheek and she quickly wiped it out with the back of her hand as he heard Roman opening the door to the apartment.

“Both of your friends are fine” he said as he closed the door behind him and dropped a bag he was carrying on the armchair in front of her. “I managed to get some of your stuff” She looked at the bag and felt her eyes tearing again. It was Zulema’s bag, she realized. 

“What is this place?” she asked her brother 

“Its your place” he answered as he made his way to the kitchen and filled a glass of water from the sink. He drank half of it before he continued. “Your friend bought it I guess…I live two blocks from here”

“My friend…?” she asked with a frown

“Zulema” 

“What?” she removed her legs from under her and rested her bear feet on the floor. Roman left the glass on the sink and took a deep breath. He didn’t want to talk about Zulema. He hated the woman for destroying his family and putting his sister through hell. “Roman” Macarena urge him to speak. She didn’t understand anything now and she wanted to know…she needed to know.

“She found me a month ago” he took a seat on the couch next to her. 

“What the hell are you doing here and what do you want?” He had asked when he saw the brunette waiting on him in front of the door leading up to his apartment. She was smoking a cigarette, leaning her back on the wall. A few minutes had passed where he just stared at her with a disgust look on his face. “Have you finally managed to kill my sister and came to gloat?” 

“Relax Romancito” she took one last drag of her cigarette and threw it away with a flick of her fingers. “Maca is ok” she said as she took a step towards him. “She’s home…probably cooking something dreadful” She continued towards him. 

“Why hasn’t she called me?” he asked leaning back on his feet 

“I have no idea” Zulema simply said with a shrug, truly not understanding why the blonde hasn’t contacted her brother yet. “But she will” she continued. “I’m going to give you something that you will hold on to for me until I call you back”

“I’m not doing anything for you” was his reply as he took a step around her towards the door to his building.

“It’s something for Maca” she continued with her back towards him. The mentioning of his sister again made him stop. Zulema turned around to face him. “When I call you again, it will be for you to pick up your sister and give her this keys to this address” She extended him a piece of paper and a set of keys that he took with distrust…she continued “La rubia and I will be parting ways soon…She doesn’t know it yet…but she will soon, and you will give her this” 

“You expect me to believe that you will let her walk away without killing her first” he had asked, not buying this for one minute. 

She took a deep breath, “Maybe…we will soon find out, wont we?” and with a smile she walked away.

“She called me again about five days ago and told me you were in trouble” Roman continued not looking at Maca this time, he was leaning forward with arms on his knees. “She said that the last thing you guys were doing did not go as planned and that you needed my help”. At this point Macarena had stood up from her chair and was walking back and forth absorbing everything he was telling her. “She gave me the location of your caravan and told me where she had hidden some jewels. She mentioned she knew a guy with a helicopter that was supposed to pick you up and I was to pay him with the money that was hidden with the jewels”

Maca turned around in disbelieve “And you believed her?!..Just like that?” 

“She’s been in contact with me Maca…She’s been sending me pictures of you almost every day…”as a good faith” she had said” He said with a scoff and stood up in from of his sister and grab her arms. “That bitch was crazy…I know…but I knew she wasn’t scheming anything against us this time”

Macarena’s head was spinning right now. How did Zulema manage to work with Roman behind her back to help her but then sold her to Sandoval’s mother and brother?. She never knew what was going through the brunette’s head and now she never will because she was dead…and Maca was alive, safe in an apartment Zulema had bought for her. “What about the jewels?” she asked, remembering that last piece of information. 

Roman walked away and disappeared through the hallway leading to the bedroom. He came back a minute after with a small green bag and gave it to her. She let a breath out she didn’t know she was holding when she saw what was inside the bag. The jewels they got from Ramala and some money. She started crying…right then and there…sobbing like a child in her brother’s arms. He held her tight against him…the bag with the jewels discarded on the floor. 

Two days later she was meeting with Goya and Triana to hand off their part of the bounty and say their goodbyes.

“She really is dead is she?” Goya had asked with a sad look on her face

Maca only manage to nod before she continued walking towards the car Roman was waiting in. They drove off without a word. 

She had managed to evade the police for the next few weeks. She was surprised they hadn’t showed up yet to the apartment looking for her and taking her back to jail. She’s been expecting them every day, but they never came. Her routine was simple. She would get up in the morning, cook some breakfast and go for a run before everyone was out about their business. Roman would bring her some groceries once a week. She met her niece one afternoon. She was beautiful and reminded Maca of herself when she was that young. She was a happy kid, calling her aunty Maca the moment they met. She wondered if her baby was going to be that happy. She wondered if she was going to be a good mother to him. She had done some many bad things and had gone through the hell that she didn’t know she would deserve anything good in her life. But when she thought of her child, hands on her belly, a warm feeling would spread through her and she would feel a peace she hadn’t felt in a long time. 

She thought of Zulema every day. She found the polaroid camera and the picture they took on New Years Eve. She didn’t know why Roman decided that it was something worth keeping but she was glad he did. It was the only thing left from Zulema, she thought, that and the bag Roman brought with him. She never went back to the Caravan. Too many good and bad memories to relive, so she stayed away. Every time she thought of the brunette a mixed of feelings would come smack her in the chest. She would cry at times, alone in the apartment. She regretted a lot of things in her life, one of them was having met Zulema…and the other…not trying to have a better relationship with her when she had the time. She realized she came to care for her despite everything they went through. Life with Zulema had been strangely fun and exciting. Zulema, she realized, was funny and warm when she wanted to be, when lazy afternoons would catch them on the roof of the caravan sipping beer and talking about the girls they met in prison and the funny memories of that time. They never mentioned their own relationship in Cruz del Norte and how messed up it had been…or the many times they tried to kill each other. Perhaps that was the problem, Maca though. They should have talked about it, go to therapy, if they were going to continue living together, to somehow make their relationship a bit less toxic. But they never did any of that. They continue living in that bubble with all those negative feelings inside, only letting them out when they couldn’t hold them any longer. 

Maca thought of that night, on New Years Eve, when Zulema finally let go from always being in control to letting Maca do what she’s been expecting the blonde wanted to do that night. They had been drunk and high, but if Maca was being completely honest with herself, it was the best night she had had in years, despite telling Zulema otherwise the next day. She had kissed and tasted the brunette and it had been intoxicating. Knowing their history and the fact that Zulema was not into women, it had been a surprise and exhilarating feeling when the brunette had pulled at her hair and kissed her neck. She had wanted it for a while, to see the always composed and stoic Zulema open up like that for her. To hear her moaning Maca’s name in the blonde’s ear muffled by the sound of the background music was something she’ll never forget. And the fact that she had been the first and only woman Zulema had let her touch and kiss her like that was giving her feelings she didn’t want to name. God she missed her! She thought as she put the picture she’s been staring at for the past few minutes back in the drawer of her night table. 

She was woken up the next day by a knock on the door. Roman was at work today, so she knew it wasn’t him. A cold feeling run through her spine and she picked up her gun from under her pillow. It was probably the police, she thought as she made her way through the small hallway to the front of her apartment. Or better, yet, Ramala and his men had finally tracked her down and came to collect what she owed. She checked her gun was loaded before making her way to the door. If she was going down tonight she’ll take as many hijos de putas with her as she could. Another knock pulled her out of her thoughts, and she looked through the peephole trying to make as less noise as possible.  
Whoever was on the other side was not who she was expecting. Calming her breathing for a second she put the hand holding the gun behind her back and she opened the door.  
“Castillo” She said almost out of breath as she felt her heartbeat slowing down.

“Its good to see you Maca” he greeted her with a smile. “May I?” he asked signaling to the apartment.

“Yeah…yeah…of course” She let him enter and locked the door behind her and followed him to the living room.

“How have you been” he asked with a worried look on his face

“I uh…ok I guess…busy”

“I can imagine that”

“How did you find me” she asked putting her gun in the back of the waistband of her sweatpants and took a seat at the far end of the couch. Castillo followed her movement and sat himself opposite her on the other end of the couch.

“You’ve been hard to track for the past couple of years…do you know that?” he said with a smile. And he was glad the police never managed to locate her and Zulema all this time. He cared for the blonde as a father figure. He thought he owed her for accidentally killing her mother and would do all in his power to always keep her safe. 

“You’d have to thank Zulema for always moving us around” She commented without thinking and immediately closed her mouth, lowering her gaze to her hands on her lap.

“Well I did thank her this time also for leading me to you” 

“How did she manage that?” she asked with concern in her voice. What did Zulema do before she got herself killed? She wondered.

“She finally gave me your location last night”. He answers nonchalant, repositioning himself on the couch. “I guess she was pretty high on pain meds to do that” 

“Wh…What?” Maca was looking at him now with wide eyes and feeling her heart wanting to come out of her chest. “Last night…you said?”

“Yup” 

“But Zulema is dead” the serious tone on her voice told him that Maca had no idea what had happened after she had left Zulema behind. “I saw her die…I saw the blood…and, and more cars coming for her”

“That was me and the police, she called a few days before, she wanted to make a deal…Ramala and his men, for her life and yours. She wanted immunity, and in turn, she was going to help us finally get Ramala and all his drug empire” 

“She’s alive?” Maca couldn’t believe her hears. He heart rate was going wild. 

“She was pretty banged up when we got to her, I took her to the hospital right away, so yeah...she's alive”

“Oh my god” she covered her mouth with her hand and let out a sob. 

“I also found out she’s pretty sick…but…you probably already knew that” Maca only managed to nod absently and he continued. “I guess the scorpion finally got stung with her own poison huh..?”

“Yeah” the blonde barely said, still trying to gather her thoughts. 

“Well, this is your time Maca…you can stay away from her for good, and start a new life, a better one”

“I…can you tell me where she is?...please…

Castillo looked at her for a second. He couldn't possibly understand the relationship the two women have. But looking at Maca now he could only nod "Ok"


	6. In Sickness and In Health, Till Death Do Us Part

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end guys. Happy ending because after what I just watched I need some pick me up. Season 5 never happened. Puta mierda de temporada.  
> Hope you like this one. Thank you for reading.

Chapter 6

Maca stood outside the hospital room for roughly 15 minutes. After Castillo left, she got dressed in a haste, grabbing whatever was at hand and putting it on, a pair of faded jeans, boots, a yellow t-shirt and brown jacket that had seen better days. She gathered her keys from the kitchen counter and closed the door behind her while putting her blond hair in a messy bun. 

A million thoughts were running through her head as she stared at the closed door to Zulema’s room. Should she turn around and never come back? Will she be at peace if she did? Should she just go in and face whatever was happening on the other side? Will Zulema know she was ever here?. 

Shaking her head to disperse her thought she took a deep breath and finally opened the door.

The sight that greeted her was not something she thought she’d ever see. Zulema was lying in bed with eyes close. Black and blue bruises around her eyes that contrasted with the paleness of her skin. All sorts of tubes and wires around her, medications and fluids hanging from a pole to Zulema’s right side of the bed and monitors on the other. The brunette looked so small and vulnerable, not the big bad criminal she’s come to care about. Maca closed the door behind her and slowly made her way in, standing at the foot of the bed. 

Looking at Zulema she noticed her chest rising with every breath and Maca exhaled a sigh of relief as if she didn’t believe Zulema was alive until now, when she could finally see it with her own eyes. She looked around the room and it reminded her of the infirmary at Cruz del Sur, with bare walls and the smell of disinfectant lingering in the air. She turned her head back towards Zulema and noticed the other woman had woken up and was looking at her.

Maca’s heart started beating wildly in her chest and all sort of emotions came clashing all at once. She never thought she would see Zulema again…and in the solitude of her new home she had mourned her. She had felt guilty in a way because the other woman had done so many terrible things to her, she had destroyed her family and her life that mourning her loss would have been ridiculous. But Zulema, after all they went through, after all the fights and their futile attempts to kill each other in prison, became her only family in the last two years they were together. They came to rely on each other, not like normal people would do, but in a very distinctive way. Their relationship was not a common one, she definitely knew that, and Maca realized that she liked it that way. Seeing the brunette now, breathing air in her lungs and looking at her in silence, as she always did, Maca knew that all of what she felt when she thought Zulema was dead, was completely true. She had crossed so many lines in her life, from stealing for some guy she thought she loved, going to jail, killing people, to loving this woman in front of her. It all became full circle, she had analyzed her life many times, and she finally realized that everything had happened precisely as it should. This was where she was supposed to be.

“What are you doing here rubia?” Zulema's voice had brought her back to reality and she had to blink a couple of times to center herself. 

“I thought you were dead” was the blonde’s reply

“You mean I’m not?”

Maca smiled at the comment and reached to her right to pull up the chair in the corner of the room closer to the bed. She sat down to Zulema’s left and noticed the brunette following her every move. 

“You look terrible” Maca commented, eyes roaming Zulema’s form.

“Flattery would get you anywhere rubia” the brunette said slightly adjusting her head on her pillow to face Maca. “You look hot yourself” she continued with a smirk.

The blonde smiled at the comment “when did you last get your pain medicine?”

“Dunno know…why?”

“Because you seem high as a kite” said Maca with a wider smile this time.

“I told that damn nurse no drugs” Zulema said looking at the door, then back to Maca and continued with a whisper “she’s way too bossy and never listens…like you”

Maca shook her head amused but didn’t respond. She just looked at Zulema with soft eyes until the brunette averted her gaze, clearly uncomfortable. 

“Why are you still here Maca?”

Macarena thought about it for a moment. What was she doing indeed? What was she expecting to gain from being here?. She had feelings for Zulema, yes, but did Zulema feel the same? What did Maca want from her, from their strange relationship?

“I hated you” the blonde barely said with a sigh, still in thoughts, but Zulema heard her and nod with her head, agreeing with her.

“I lost my baby and my family because of you” the blonde continued. 

“And your family killed my boyfriend like a pig” 

“You tried to kill me multiple times”

“Yeah and you tried to strangle me in the bathroom while I was peeing, where are you trying to get to Maca?” Zulema said exasperated, pain killers were fading off and she was not in the mood to have this conversation again.

“I just…I’m trying to say that this isn’t healthy…whatever it was we had…wasn’t healthy” 

“Right…” Zulema replied” so what d…”

“But somehow” the blonde interrupted her and pulled herself closer to the bed looking intensely at Zulema, “Somewhere along the lines of this crazy partnership we formed…I came to care for you…very much…and very deeply” 

Zulema blinked in surprise, not believing her ears. “Then you must be more messed up in the head than I am”

Maca smiled at the comment “yeah…I must be”

They were interrupted by a knock and the door opening revealing Dr Hamil. “I heard you had visitors. You must be Macarena, Zulema’s emergency contact?” He said extending his hand to the blonde. She stood up and greeted him with a smile. “I’m glad you’re finally here. I was going to call you tomorrow to let you know Zulema was ready to go home” 

“Ok...that’s…that’s good right? The blonde replied looking at the other woman.

“Yes” Dr Hamil continued. “She’ll need to take it slow for a little while but she’s definitely out of the woods. We have some discharge instructions for you, medications, follow ups…the usual. The nurse will come in later with the paperwork, better to get it out of the way now that you’re here, then you can just come pick your friend up tomorrow” 

“No” Zulema finally said repositioning herself in bed. Her back was starting to hurt.

“Zulema we had a deal” the doctor’s tone was serious this time. “I told you that you needed someone after discharge”

“Can I get a nurse a couple of times a week then?”

“Zulema…”

“Don’t worry doctor” Maca interrupted “I’ll take her home tomorrow and make sure she follows all your instructions” she finished with a smiled.

“I hope you do. We did three weeks of chemotherapy for her tumor; new scans had showed improvement. I was hoping we didn’t have to rely on surgery and therapy appears to be working so…its good prognosis”

“Oh, that’s great new!” Maca said with a wide smile then looked a Zulema who had her eyes fixed on the wall.

“Well, I’ll leave you too alone and I will see you tomorrow Macarena”

“Yes...thank you doctor…for everything” 

Dr Hamil closed the door on his way out leaving the two women alone again.

“What the hell are you doing?” Zulema cut the silence after a while.

“Apparently helping you recover” the blonde took her sit back in the chair.

“I don’t want your help rubia”

“But you do need it” Maca said, not taking no for an answer. She knew Zulema liked to act tough and right now she was being difficult. “You’re coming home with me…to the apartment that you bought… thank you for that by the way”

“I’m going back to the caravan”

“Well I’m coming with you then”

“What is wrong with you?” Zulema couldn’t, for the life of her, understand Macarena and her actions. The blonde wanted out, she had said so herself, and yet, here she was, insisting on staying. “What are you doing..? trying to annoy the life out of me to see how fast I croak, by…”

“Oh, would you shut up…” Maca interrupted her. “I’m not going anywhere ok” she attempted to grasp Zulema’s hand, but the brunette pulled away by instinct. “Zulema” Maca sighed “I wanted to leave because I needed a different life…I need…a different life” she said emphasizing her last words. “But now I know that it doesn’t have to be a life away from you. I want us to stay together” Maca grabbed Zulema’s hand and this time the brunette didn’t pull way, she was looking at the blonde with an intense look on her face. 

“You know me rubia” she finally said “I mess everything up and you’re having a kid so, once I’m better, I’m leaving”

“Well, we can talk about that later”

They stayed silent for a while until Zulema, finally fighting the discomfort she was feeling and the pain in her body, fell asleep. Maca adjusted her position in the chair and remained there for a while holding Zulema’s hand in hers. It was not until nightfall that she returned home. 

“So, the doctor said it was ok to shower” Maca said as she closed the door to the apartment behind her. Zulema lower herself on the couch and closed her eyes. 

“I don’t want to right now” 

“Well you have to because you smell” at that Zulema opened one eye to look at the blonde. “Come one, once you get a shower you can lay down and I’ll make us some dinner” Maca grabbed her arm and pulled her up, walking her to the bathroom down the hall. She had gone to the caravan with the thought of getting some of Zulema’s stuff, but the place was empty. She had called Castillo to find out if he knew something about it and he had said everything had been taken by the police, for evidence. “There are a some of my clothes I put aside for you to wear until we can buy some for you. Do you need help with the shower?” she said with a blush that Zulema didn’t notice, thank God!. 

“No, I’ll be fine” 

“Alright, call if you need me” 

Dinner was quiet. They were not used to small talks at dinner time, unless they were planning a heist, and there were none of that in the near future. Maca couldn’t stop looking at Zulema, she sensed a different energy in the room, warmer maybe, than before. There was a dynamic between then now that it felt foreign to both of them and yet, comfortable, peaceful, it didn’t feel forced…it just was.

They settled into a peaceful routine. Maca would wake up first and pick up breakfast on her way back from her morning walk. She would remind Zulema of her morning meds then she would go straight to the shower. They would spend the day together, either at home or out in the park. The blonde would ask Zulema about her life before prison and she would tell her, which was always a surprise. They would still spat over silly things like which channel to watch or who would do the laundry that week, and Maca would cry, over nothing and Zulema would blame her damn pregnancy hormones but would give in whenever the blonde wanted something. 

It had been 3 months, and Zulema was still home. She feels oddly content, but she never says a word about it. One day their routine changed a little, Maca had a doctor’s appointment to go to that morning and in her excitement she gave Zulema a kiss on the lips on her way out. “Behave yourself” she had said, not realizing what she had done until she was out the door. Zulema on her part, had been eating her breakfast and was left paralyzed for the next 5 minutes, surprised by the blonde’s action. The kiss goodbye became a daily occurrence that neither of them mentioned, but secretly enjoyed. 

After all the heists they had ended with enough money that they didn’t need to work. Maca would visit her brother a couple of times a week, who, by the way, wasn’t too keen that Maca was back to living with Zulema again. He would never trust the other woman, and sometimes, when the three of them were together, Maca had to act as referee to avoid any major confrontation between Roman and Zulema. 

The had met with Goya and Triana a few times over the past month. Triana would tease them and asked them if they “had finally hooked up for real”, she would say in between laughs and with a mischievous look on her face. Zulema was never amused and Maca would always blush. 

One morning Zulema had asked the blonde if she wanted company to her doctor’s follow up. “You always come with me to mine so its only fair” she had said nervously and scratching the back of her head, which Maca had found oddly endearing. The blonde had been ecstatic, and without thinking she had thrown her arms around the other woman and gave her quick kiss on her cheek. They didn’t talk on the way to the clinic, but both were smiling in the inside.

Zulema’s scans were coming out almost clean, but she still had a long way to go to full recovery. 

One night, Zulema was taking a shower when she felt a hand rest on her back. She stood still; her heart was beating faster. She felt the blonde slowly caressing her back, then slim arms circling her waist and finally a naked chest pressed against her.

“Maca what are you doing?” she managed to get out in the mist of all the emotions she was feeling at the moment. 

“What does it look like I’m doing” the blonde said in a whisper, closer to her ear before placing a light kiss on Zulema’s neck. 

“Are you drunk?...high?” was all Zulema could think of given their previous history.

Maca just smiled against her neck “You know I’m not” another kiss close to Zulema’s ear. “I just missed you…I never stopped thinking of our first night together”

“You said it was stupid” replied Zulema trying to suppress a moan when Maca took her earlobe in her mouth.

“Obviously I lied”

“Obviously” She finally turned and faced the blonde who did not move from her spot and was very much close to Zulema, breasts now touching. “We don’t do this” 

“But we want to…right?” was Maca response. She was looking at Zulema, standing inches from her, looking scared. “I want you…and you want me” the blonde continued this time stepping even closer to the other woman, lips almost touching “I love you…and you love me”

Zulema felt her heart hammer in her chest and was sure the blonde could feel it given how close she was. She knew there were feelings between them, unspoken feelings that neither of them had dared to mentioned before, there have been pecks on the lips, shy smiles, and compromise the way it never was before. But they had never spoken of love. She knew she felt it and was almost sure the other woman felt it as well, but to talk about it, to let it all out was terrifying for her. Zulema never had anything good and genuine in her life and Maca was all that despite how big of a bitch the blonde had become over the years. Maca was still better than her. 

“Maca..” Zulema didn't really know what she wanted to say

“Shhh…can we talk more about that later?” the blonde kissed her this time, just a brush of lips. “please…?” and Zulema gave in, how could she not? She circled the blonde with her arms and kissed her back. Maca put her arms around the other woman’s neck and held her close as they kissed…slowly first, as if memorizing each other’s mouth, then deep and needy in a desperate attempt to draw each other in. Zulema pushed Maca against the wall and started trailing kissed from her neck to the valley between her breast and further south. It was exhilarating, having Maca moaning her name and coming undone with every touch and every kiss.

They ended up in bed, wet from the shower, Maca had decided she wasn’t going to wait for them to get dry and she needed Zulema desperately. She needed to touch her and taste her and make sure she was still with her. That the possibility of Zulema being dead had been an illusion, a terrible nightmare. And she wanted to let her know how she felt, how important Zulema was to her. They felt asleep after hours of exploring each other. The frantic sex had become a gentle lovemaking, they had looked into each other’s while they came, multiple times, and with each touch, and kiss and moans and name screaming, they understood that their lives were linked, their destinies intertwined, and Zulema had understood that for the first time she didn’t need to go anywhere, or run like she had done her whole life, from her mother, the pig she was sold to, from jail… She realized that she didn’t need to run when she finally has a home…and this place, and Maca, were her home.


End file.
